Christmas has Come and No Little Princess Yet!

I really believed with all my heart, that when we started our adoption paperwork, that we would have our little Princess by Christmas time. If she wasn't in our arms, at least we would know who she was.

That didn't happen. So, I continue to journal thoughts and feelings in a separate document.

I still know that God is faithful. I pray that He watches over our sweet little one.

Psalm 121:3, 5-6
He will not let your foot slip. He who watches over you will not slumber. The Lord watches over you. The Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm. He will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

Mommy Prays for a Ladybug

Our papers were sent to China on Thanksgiving Day 2009. We know that they arrived because our agency contacted us to let us know.

I have heard stories of people waiting and waiting and waiting... often, not hearing anything for months about the process in their adoption.

I sent up a simple prayer. "God, would you please send me a ladybug when our papers are on their way?" I'm not sure whether that sentence truly ended with a question mark or an explanation point.

I just wanted a "sign from God" that the papers were coming or something big was about to happen next.

I wondered how He was going to send a ladybug... especially since we were in the dead of winter; but, I didn't have to worry about that. I knew God was bigger than "winter."

The Vision of the Lavender Rose

October 12, 2009…

This night will be in my mind forever. I attended a Jewish class that teaches people to hear God through visions and dreams. It was only the third time I had attended. For whatever reason, this particular day, I had been feeling stressed. I don’t get stressed out… I am usually a zero on the stress-o-meter, but I was at least a 2 or 3 tonight. My friend and co-worker, Kristy, pulled me out of the prayer meeting and asked me what was wrong.

I said, “I think I am worried about Gabriella and whether or not she will be beautiful to us.” The whole conversation and my thought process seemed rather ridiculous because I have so much faith in God, that doubting such a simple thing was just not lining up with how big my God is. Kristy and I had a brief conversation and then we went back in to the meeting.

Isaiah 43:5-7
Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west. I will say to the north, "Give them up!" and to the south, "Do not hold them back." Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth - everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made.

At the end of the evening, we were to get together with another person and ask the Lord to give us a “picture” for each other. The lady next to me, whom I did not know, nor had ever seen, took my hands, prayed in tongues for a minute or so, and then said the following:

“I see a delicate lavender rose that you have placed your hands around as though you have cupped it. You are worried about the petals falling off and getting bruised, but God is saying that He is taking care of the rose.” Annie Jones

I do not know this lady. She did not know my life’s circumstances. She just explained a picture that she received from the Lord. I wrote frantically what she said before I forgot it. She looked at me with a strange look and asked, "Does that mean anything to you?" I told her it did, but didn't say anything more.

I was excited and shocked. I knew EXACTLY what that “picture” meant, but I did not share anything with Annie until the next week after I had a few minutes to share with my friends Kristy and her friend Jennifer.

This was the interpretation I received from the vision.
The word lavender was chosen for two reasons. First, the little girl that we are adopting has always been known to us as our little Princess. Lavender is a young purple color and purple is the color of royalty. A Queen would be a deep purple while a Princess could be considered a lavender color.

The second reason I believe God chose this word was for me to clearly know that He was speaking specifically about Gabriella. Not only because she is our “Princess Baby”, but also because I put a lavender scent on her Giraffee-moo-moo blanket each week.

Jennifer thought that the rose was chosen because it is delicate. As a fragile flower, it needs a lot of attention and care just like our special needs adopted Princess will need when she comes home. Jennifer said that roses need our full-time attention. I looked up the word rose in a Bible-based dictionary of dream symbols and found out that “rose” is used to display the glory of God, a beautiful expression of His love, and to speak “love”. Gabriella, then, would be our love, the one we love.

We are so blessed to know with confidence that God is taking care of our little Princess and her paperwork.

Giraffee-Moo-Moo

To pass the time waiting and wondering which little Princess will join our family, Tyanna and I occasionally went shopping for her. Because my heart was so set on a 3 year old, we have been shopping for size 3T. Oh, if we are wrong, the poor Princess will end up naked.

One of the things that Tyanna found was one of those mini animal blankets. It was a mini pink blanket with an adorable giraffe on the top. We actually found two. So, we bought them both: one to keep in America and one to hopefully send to China once we are matched.

Every night I would sleep with Giraffee (pronounced jer-af-ee). One of the things I did was annoint her with oil and pray over her as though I was praying over our little Princess. I also would put lavender oil on her. Giraffee became a little promise to hold onto... someday my baby will be united with us and we would hold her close.

Another day of shopping came and went... they seemed to come and go all to frequently. On one of our shopping excursions, we found a Giraffee bath towel. We were excited... super excited... UNTIL, we found out Giraffee wasn't a giraffe at all; she was a cow. Oh no!... now what do I do? I fell in love with Giraffee. I had already slept with her for a couple months. But, it was all to clear: Giraffee needed a name change. Giraffee is now officially Giraffee-Moo-Moo.

The Home Study

Our home study was started the day before school was out. We had prepared the house all week. It was in "show" quality. Probably not what our social worker was looking for, after all, where would a 3 year old play in OUR home? We still aren't sure. But, we'll figure it out... as long as she doesn't touch the furniture. Oh dear.

We all had our interviews. Our social worker wrote up our homestudy, and the 18 page preliminary copy was back in our hands about 40 days later.

A Bedroom for a Princess (or two)

It's Easter Sunday, 2010.

Sixteen years ago, when our son was two, the Lord gave me a vision of two little girls that looked like they were 3 and 5 years old. He never confirmed their age... but, in my mind, I thought that was how old they must be. What I did know was that they had dark shoulder-length hair and tan skin. I knew that I did not birth them, but that they were ours. I had no idea how we were going to get them. Our son and daughter have grown up knowing that they have two little sisters. Daddy always said, "When God brings them to our doorstep, I will know that they are ours. Since then, I have dreamed and prayed for our little princesses. My heart constantly ached for them. Millions of tears were shed for them. I knew that they were out there, I just didn't know where.

This photo was taken and added to this blog on 7/19/2012... 

Amaris has been home 3 weeks... she is 2 years and 5 months old... 

Gabriella has been home 2 years... she is 5 years and 7 months old...

My vision did NOT have two sweet little princesses in matching clothes, 

but I did know that they had dark hair to their shoulders and tan-skin.

The older girl turned and ran in the field behind her. 

If you read this blog, you will know that Gabriella could not even stand when we got her. 

She still, to date, has not taken a valid step by herself unassisted. 

But, someday soon, she will walk and talk, run and jump, hop and skip and play basketball. 

How do I know? The Lord gave me a vision now 18 years ago. And, I believe Him!

Fast forward 16 years. In April 2009, the Lord CLEARLY told me that I was to prepare the bedroom for our two little girls. I instantly knew exactly what the room was going to look like... even down to the comforters. I got on e-bay and searched for 5 days (all day) for Disney Princess comforters... but, never found what I was looking for... it was pink, had 3 princesses, and some type of fancy words on it. I was a bit frustrated I couldn't find what was so strongly embedded in my mind. On the fifth day, I prayed and asked the Lord what to do. As clear as clear could be, I immediately heard Him speak to my heart, "Go to Target!" I responded, "But I don't shop at Target." Then, I remembered who I was talking to. My prayer has always been that God will help me to hear His voice and that I would not question it. I grabbed my keys and left. Once I found the comforters in Target, I was amazed (silly me) that the comforters that were in my heart and mind, were right there on the shelf. Long story short, I bought all that I needed, matched paint, the border, the lamp, furniture, etc... and within a day or two, I had a beautiful princess room for two.

This was just the beginning. I had bigger plans for this room. While I was searching for princess comforters, I also was searching for princess beds. My heart was set on a particular castle bed... but, it was outrageous for a little princess... $3,500 - $6,000 depending on where I bought it. But, I knew it would be mine. So, I just prayed and confessed it would be so.

While the room was being prepared, so were hearts and the paperwork for our first little princess.

Jason had been on an international business trip. Being away from the family and seeing little ones from the country he visited, started to get him thinking about adopting.

I had intentionally NOT told him about the bedroom. If it was God's timing, I knew that God would speak to him separately. I have to say, I was a bit unsure of what his reaction to the bedroom would be... would he laugh... or, would he say his first swear word? I will say this... he was VERY surprised there was a completed princess room in his house.

God was working on his heart, because by the time he had landed in America, he was already thinking about adopting. Before the week had ended, we were already searching for an agency.